Lucas is still proposing (if you don't know what I mean, read this).

Friday night I took him and Crystal (Javier's niece) home. On the way to drop him off, he proposed again. Crystal and I laughed and she said something about how it's never going to happen.

Lucas says, "Yes it will, I have faith. God answers prayers."

Then he proceeds to tell us that he asked in his Bible class at school for them to pray that his youth pastor would marry him.

When we were relaying this story to Javier and Sam (Crystal's dad, Javier's brother) later on that night, Sam looks at Javi and says, "Well I hope he didn't mean you."

:)

So again, not really "teen" related... but another update to my life list:

I've been featured on Jasmine Star's blog :)

Here are a couple of my favorites:

I almost feel like just leaving it at that and not even telling you the story behind this picture...

...almost...

...but I like to talk :)

This is Sarah (our intern) and Daniel (one of our teens). This is what Daniel did to Sarah instead of just saying "hello" like a normal person.

But that is why we love our kids...

...they're hands on...

...and they seem to have this weird obsession with hair... anyone know if there is a medical term for that?

Just wanted to share a couple of pictures of what youth group typically looks like.

Here are some of the kids in the gym during the Wednesday night service...
And part of one of our "small groups" on Friday night

Yesterday I accomplished something on my life list :)

I know that this is unrelated to my teens, but since I started writing about it on here, I have decided to continue with updates.

DO A PHOTOSHOOT WITH JASMINE STAR.

It was amazing! It will be posted on her blog at the end of this week or beginning of next week if you want to check it out.

Here are a couple behind the scenes pictures:

I am so thankful that I am where I am.

But if that weren't enough, God has blessed me with people to work with that I really love.

I get to work for my dad which is amazing! But in addition to that, I have been fortunate enough to really form friendships with our other pastors, and even our volunteers!

We have an intern from Biola University who is completing credits with us. Her name is Sarah. Yesterday, Sarah and I went to Disneyland!

Afterwards, we went with Javier and Sam to get pumpkins and carve them:


The funniest part was Sarah's portrait of Javier on her pumpkin :)
I am continually blessed by my job. It is so much more than a job. I am grateful for amazing people who make it that much better :)

***WARNING: This is not the typical "happy post" that I usually post. I find so much joy in what I do, and I typically write about that, and the triumphs, but today something is on my heart and I really felt like writing about it. So feel free to read, think and comment, but just keep in mind it's not the norm.***

I've mentioned before that I grew up in Oregon. And not only in Oregon, but in relatively small towns in Oregon. I have parents that taught me well... especially when it came to racism and hate. I learned from a very young age that the color of someone's skin was just that... a physical characteristic. That it didn't make them any less of a person. I also learned that we should love people regardless... that Jesus died for EVERYONE... not just the people we like. Those lessons were so important for me to learn. Because of the way I was raised and the person that God has made me, I really don't notice race as anything more than a physical characteristic... like blond hair or brown hair, green eyes or blue eyes, short or tall... Unfortunately, I cannot say the same for the world that I live in.

Our church is multinational. It's even in the name. Cerritos Crossroads MULTINATIONAL Church of the Nazarene/Mas Que Vencedores (yes it's long, but it's who we are). We speak 5 different languages officially and several others unofficially. We live in an area where this is not uncommon... Granted, it is a bit uncommon in the church... but southern California is full of different cultures and languages and nationalities.

It is also full of hatred and racism. I get so frustrated when I see that. I don't understand how people can feel so much disdain towards another human being simply because of the way they look, or where they were born, or where their GREAT GRANDPARENTS were born! It doesn't make sense to me.

That hatred translates in so many different ways. One of those became very real for some of my teens this week. A girl at one of the many local high schools in the area was shot and killed. She was the friend of one of my girls. She was killed at a party when someone came in and shot her. I don't know the details, but I know it was gang related... and gangs are driven by the need for power and surrounded by racial issues which often turns into hatred for no apparent reason.

It breaks my heart to see these things happening... and happening right in front of me. My heart goes out to this girl's family and friends. This isn't the first time something like this has impacted my teens. I continue to thank God for keeping them safe and pray that they continue to make good choices and stay out of harm's way.

Gangs are very real. I never really realized that until I moved here. But now that I'm here and closer than ever to real people affected by real gangs, I am driven to do something. Gangs are full of kids who need Jesus. And I honestly believe that Jesus can really and truly save these kids and change their lives.

I got a very unique invitation in the mail last week.

It was from a church, inviting me to Hell.

Yes, Hell.

It's a Halloween alternative that this church does... I guess it's some sort of show.

I was reading the invitation to Javier and one of our boys was standing there and overheard.

He turns to me and says, "I want to go to Hell."

Then he realized what he said, "Wait. I think that came out wrong."

:)

It takes a special person to be a youth pastor.

There's really a balance between being their friend, their mentor, their spiritual leader, and a little bit of a goof ball.

I was sorting through pictures on my computer today of my kids, and I started seeing a bit of a pattern... so I thought I'd share some proof of the goof ball side. :)

At the fireworks stand... I really dont know what Im doing...
Eating a Popsicle... I think it was for a photo scavenger hunt.
Silly sunglasses
Another one for the scavenger hunt... hanging out in a tree...
In a fountain... you'd be amazed how many fountains Ive been in...
Playing on the playground at the church
Rock Candy... yess!
Winter Camp... He started it.
Girl's night. I promise I do not dress like that on a regular basis.
Trying to get Bernice to smile... it worked :)
Always trying to get the kids to laugh for pictures...
There is no explanation for this one.
More from the playground.
We were dancing. We're actually really good :)

I don't have a lot to blog about today, but I thought I'd show you where I work :)

My white board. It is next to my desk and its how I brainstorm and sort things out. What you see on there is all the camp finance info from this summer... I'm still sorting through it all :)
my couch... it gets a lot of use from teens who come and crash after school... and before youth group... and Sunday afternoon... and any other time they catch me in my office :)
My desk calendar... what would I do without it??? I write EVERYTHING on here and even get teased at staff meetings because I bring the whole thing to staff meeting every week! You may also notice all the post it note lists... more about that later :)
Hand prints... one of my favorite parts of my office... my kids put their hand prints on my wall... in my old office I had one wall almost covered... I haven't done so well in this office... but I'm working on it.
It looks chaotic, but there's a lot of organization... and some chaos :) I have everything on these shelves from books to DVDs to pictures to food to random gadgets... they tend to collect things.
My duck. I don't know where it came from, but now it lives on my shelf and I like it.
My stuffed penguin and picture from NYC 2007 in Missouri... mixed in with some CDs, DVDs and even a video tape :)
My desk and computer. Where I spend most of my "office hours"...
Post it notes... They're everywhere!!!
Encouragement from my teens... they're so cool! I have a whole folder full of stuff like this that they've made me that I keep and pull out in times of frustration.
My treo 755 is AMAZING! it does everything and it hooks up to my computer so that they update each other... My office phone is great too, although there are so many buttons and I always seem to push the wrong ones :)
I have a thing with writing utensils... I love them. And I can never have enough. There's also my elephant paperweight that my friend Danny brought my back from his Jesus Film mission trip to Africa. The picture is from an event we did where the teens nailed things in their lives to the cross.
To do lists and post it notes... They're everywhere! They keep me sane and on track, even though anyone looking at them would probably just be confused :)
Just thought I'd give some insight on my life :)

So since posting about my Life List, I have been fortunate enough to have a couple of updates... and I know this isn't technically about my teens, but since I wrote about it on here, I thought I'd give updates. I created a special tag for it, so if it's something you're interested in you can follow it. If not, sorry to deviate from the typical blog topics... but again, I write this blog as a way for me to look back and remember things and be encouraged. I am excited about this list and working at accomplishing the things that are on it. So here we go!

I don't want to give away too much just yet, but I am SUPER excited about a couple of opportunities that I have. The first one is this: I have a photoshoot booked with Jasmine Star! That is what I am MOST excited about right now! I cannot wait. It is definitely going to be a blast. This is a photographer I came across when I first got interested in photography a couple of years ago, and she was just kind of starting out. I was completely blown away by her work and who she is as a person (she's a pastor's kid too!). I haven't actually met her, but I have followed her blog and I am fortunate enough to have the opportunity to meet her in just a couple of weeks! She has inspired me in more ways than one, and I am so excited that I finally get to do this... and meet her!

Another update... I'm working on some of my running goals. I'm coming up with a plan and I am going to try really hard to be disciplined enough to stick to a schedule and start working towards that marathon. I don't really like to run, but I know it's good for me and I really want to do a marathon (although I'm not really sure why...).

I have something else possibly coming up that I'm pretty excited about too, but I haven't decided for sure, so I don't want to write too much about that yet.

I'll keep updating as I accomplish things!

God is sure good. Even when life isn't :)

There's a tradition in our Sunday School class called the "what if" book. Its a book full of questions that start with "what if" and they are designed to get the teens thinking. Sometimes I'll pull it out and ask a few if we have some extra time.

Sunday our conversation went a little something like this:

Question: "What if you found the cure for cancer?"
Teen's answer: "Then I'd cure cancer"

Question: "What if you could get rid of one rule at school?"
Teen's answer: "I'd get rid of the rule that we have to go to school"

Wow. Sometimes, they definitely DON'T make you think!

After church on Sunday I was talking to one of my teens as he was walking away from me. He didn't respond, so I said, "did you hear me?"

He whipped around and said, "Did you just say 'will you marry me?'"
To which Lucas (a 13 year old teen) replied, "I want to marry you! Why didn't you ask me to marry you?"

I laughed.

He continued.

All afternoon.

"Diandra, will you marry me?"
"No Lucas"

Now let me just take a minute and say that I think it is important for my teens to know that I love them. I tell them that all the time. And it's actually pretty cool because some of these kids never hear that from anyone. And some of those kids that were super uncomfortable the first time I told them I loved them are now very comfortable with that fact. It is not out of the ordinary for one of our kids to tell us they love us. So on Sunday afternoon....

Lucas: I love you Diandra
Diandra: I love you too!
Lucas: Then will you marry me?
Diandra: No Lucas.

PS... the kids have taken to mocking my cheesy smile.

I am kind of young.

Especially for being a "grown up".

And not only that, but I look like I'm 16. Case in point... oftentimes when new teens come, they ask me who the youth pastor is... or they'll ask me where I go to school, and so on.

I find that I often blend in and parents have a hard time finding me among the 70 teens in the gym. It's much easier to find the tall bald man :)

Part of the reason I blend in is because I often dress like I'm 16. You will more than likely find me wearing ripped jeans, flip flops and a t-shirt rather than a dress or suit.

I am influenced by what the kids are wearing... even though I don't always notice it.

I bought some tennis shoes the other day because I liked them. I've seen them before and I have always kind of liked them. I wore them to youth group and the kids were laughing at me... I couldn't figure out why. Then Javier told me: The shoes I'd bought (Nike Cortez's) are "gangster shoes"... and apparently seeing this little blond girl wearing them made all my kids laugh. But I've decided I like them anyway :)
There are things like that that I just don't understand... or realize. Part of it I think is growing up in Oregon and not really being around the "LA atmosphere"... I am working in a very urban youth group... and I absolutely LOVE it. I wouldnt trade it for the world... although I am apparently still a little clueless. Luckily my kids manage to look past that.

But I am noticing that they are rubbing off on my a little:
:)

You may remember my previous post regarding pants laying on the ground.

If you don't, STOP reading and read this first.

And now... I present you with what seems to be common place in youth group now:

Myspace.

It's my best friend...

It's my worst enemy.

I love it and hate it all at once.

But one wonderful thing about it is that I find out all kinds of things about my teens and who they are and who they hang out with and how they perceive themselves. I occasionally get on and just kind of browse through their pages and what they're writing. Yesterday I came across this blog entry:

"I wish emotional pain never existed. I've realized that emotional pain always drives me to do stupid things that I know I shouldn't be doing, like drinking, ditching, bitching at random people for absolutely no reason, even trying to take my own life. I don't know why I do it; probably because it makes me feel like I have power and people can't control me. I live my own life.
I've realized how many times I've thought about suicide; it's countless. I don't even know how to explain it or where to begin, but I realized that temptations and urges to breathe my last breath was common from the beginning of freshman year. Most people already know why, and if you don't, then you're going to have to ask in private, because I'm not the same person I was 4 years ago--the person who was open about who I liked, and didn't give a damn about what the world thought... That's gone.
I've been feeling this way for a long time. I don't know why. It's been stirring in my mind since mid-summer. A lot of things happened since I got home from retreat that have changed my life; things that I should be grateful for, but for some reason, I take it for granted. I guess the only thing that keeps me going is the fact that there are people who are going through what I'm going through. One of these people is going through pretty much the same thing I went through freshman year that led to my downfall. She's someone I looked up to since my sophomore year, when my sister started bringing me to church and then left me. I was more of looking for a "sister-figure" that I could depend on, because my sister couldn't be with me anymore, and this person (some how) became my sister-figure. A few months ago, things started to happen that pretty much changed her. Don't get me wrong; I still look at her and love her like my very own sister, but seeing how she has to deal with the things she goes through every day really breaks my heart, especially knowing how it feels through every perspective. And seeing who she is and knowing that she has to hide her emotions for work everyday because so many people look up to her really inspires me. I don't know why, but it just makes me want to keep going with my life.
Sometimes things get in the way and I lose track, and often times I feel frustrated and stressed to the point where I just want to give up, but I often think about who she is and what she's going through, yet she's still hanging strong, and it kind of helps me.

Considering that it's not 2:40-ish, I think I should go do my homework. =) Bye!"

My name was not mentioned but I know that she is talking about me. As I started reading, my heart was broken for this girl. Sometimes you can talk a kid to death... and you can listen as much as they talk, and you still have no idea the extent of what they're thinking. I read the beginning and it sounded so hopeless. But as I read on, I started to see a spark of hope. And I realized that the God I serve is AWESOME. I mean, I already knew that, but seeing Him take my crummy circumstances and actually use that to HELP one of my teens... that makes it all worth going through. Over and over again I have seen God use this situation and I know that He will continue to use it. I am so thankful that my God is more powerful than anything or anyone else!